Update

Well, here's an update but it isn't going to be much of one. I'm working. That's pretty much it. That's all I do. I get up, go to work, come home and cry with feet pain, go to sleep and do it all over again.

I like my job. If it wasn't for the whole my feet want to run off without my body because of the abuse that I put them through with standing so long, it'd be great! Talking to people is great and for the most part I've not gotten anyone really nasty coming through my check-out.

I do have several bits of advice, but probably not enough time to go into them all, but I'll try.

1. Please, for the love of God, hang up your cell phones and pay attention. I'm sure that whoever is on the other line won't mind if you call back. I'm sure that you are not so important that you absolutely need to be on the phone for the 5 minutes it takes to purchase your selections. You can find your debit card, money, checkbook, change and anything else you need much faster if you aren't on the phone. The people behind you will appreciate this as well.

2. Please have your money ready. I know you don't know the total but you can at least have your wallet out of your purse. You honestly don't need to put alllll your bags in the basket before you take out your money. They will be there when you are done, really.

3. If you know you are going to pay cash, please don't hand me the crumpled, damp bills from your pocket and leave them to me to uncrumple them. I don't really like touching damp, crumpled money. It's just polite to flatten out your money and it helps me save time in getting you your change and/or receipt.

4. Is the ONE penny you are looking for to keep from getting pennies in your return change REALLY that important that you have to dig and dig and dig around in your pocket or purse? Put your pennies in a container at home if you don't want to carry them around in your purse/pocket. It will save you money (in the money jar at home) and both of us time.

5. Keep in mind that while your cashier may have a smile on her face, her world might be falling apart around her and it is everything in her power to keep that sucker plastered on where all can see. Don't tell her, "You really aught to smile more in your profession."

This public service announcement has been brought to you by the letters B and Z and the number 27.

(PS- I miss you guys.)

My life fell apart

I'm writing to let you know I have no internet, no phone, no cable tv (or any other kind of tv that doesn't include the dvd's I already own) and I have no money.

I possibly might be adding a husband on to that "I don't have" list.

The proverbial rug has been ripped out from under me and my entire family. It's bad. Very bad. Financially ruining, emotionally bankrupting and just... ugh, I can't think of any more things bad enough to say.

You think that you know someone and then you realize that the life you've had for the last year has been nothing but a series of lies, that become painfully aware in a single moment. I should have seen the signs, and I guess I didn't but I didn't want to keep seeing them. Acknowleding the unthinkable would have required me to change my life. I didn't want to change. I wanted to be the way everything was....blissfully ignorant, despite the fact that I was very unhappy. It's easier to be unhappy and unaware than devastated and in full disclosure.

I wish I could go into detail. Believe me, I have no problem dragging my husband through the mud right now but I don't know if his family reads my journal and I know that my own family does. They know what's going on but they still have hope for things. I don't know if I do. I think I do. I said I do but deep down...there's a knife that wants to embed itself very deep into his heart. Then we can be twins.

Pray for me and the boys if you believe in that sort of thing. I don't think I have the strength to do it for myself right now.

(P.S. - After 9 years, I'm now a working Mom. You're looking at the newest team member to the Target family. Can I help you find something?)