Pictures of the past

Ok, so I promised a picture entry and here it is. Some pictures of my past.


First we have to our left here, a picture of my family when I was oh... around 9 or 10 years old. I think 10. We lived in Southern California and my Grandparents lived in Norther California. One paticular year on our way back my parents decided that it would be a lot of fun to drive through Yosemite National Park. Yosemite mind you requires reservations six months in advance. Now days it could be more but back then it was six months. My mother called one paticular place in Yosemite, Curry Village? Something.. anyway, she called and it just so happened that they had a cancellation. Score! We stayed about 3 days there. The room was very nice, very cabin woodsy and my sister and I slept up in the loft section. It was the most beautiful place I have ever been to. I would love to go there again with my own family. Or at least a nice honeymoon with the Hunk considering that we didn't have one when we married. Something to save for!


Here is my older sister, my dad, and myself. Wasn't I just the cutest little thing you've ever seen? Of course I was. This has to be my favorite picture of me with any family members. I think this was taken right outside Disneyland Hotel. We used to live right down the street from Disneyland and sometimes my parents would take us to the Hotel to see thier "Living Waters" show type thingy. It was beautiful. During the summer you could see the fireworks they'd set off over Disneyland from our house. My mom would always let me stay up to see the fireworks and I knew as soon as they were finished it was time for bed. She said I never complained about bedtime in the summer as long as I got to see those fireworks.


When I was 12 years old I started riding horses. Here I am in some Christmas type parade the city put on where our horse club was invited to be a participant in. The horse I'm on was named Midnight and I loved that horse. The club was amazing. An older gentleman ran it for about 10 kids at a time. You had to have at least a C average in all your classes and you had to keep a clean room or you were not allowed to ride that day. My mom went a step further and if my room wasn't clean she wouldn't even take me. Needless to say during those several months I belonged to that club I had good grades and a clean room. I also learned a lot about myself too. I made friends and once a month we'd have a cookout and all eat together. My dad knew the owner from the Air Force base and he took me and my little sister (much to my dismay) on for free because he knew my dad. I wonder if that program is still around or if he is. He was pretty old even back then and this was about 13 years ago.


This is my hoochie mama friend Rachel from back in the day. I don't know how many of you know I was in a government program called Job Corps (saved my life!) and she was my room mate for almost a year and a half. We had our ups and downs, we were completely opposite and not just the way we dressed but in everything. I loved her like a sister. In our case it really is true that opposites attract. I lost touch with her when I left and she left around the same time. It was sad and to this day I still wonder how she is doing. I wonder if she ever really found the love and validation she was looking for in herself and not the men she was going through like water. We fought over a guy once. That's when I learned that guys come and go but friends... they can be the one true thing in your life. (Oh, and look, I was thin enough for a belt!)


Well that's all the blast from the past I have to show just yet. Hopefully I'll get out to my mom's house soon and snag some old pictures if I beg really hard and promise to send them back.

Skipped a day of exercise

I just finished up working out. It was a real job to make me do it tonight. I skipped out on last night so I knew that if I didn't do it tonight it would be soo much harder to do it tomorrow after two days off. Sounds like I just told myself that and made myself workout all nice and simple huh? Nuuuhh uh.

I argued with myself until 3:30 in the morning. I just could not make myself do it. I told myself all the wonderful little motivational things that you say to yourself such as:

"You'll feel better when you're finished."

"You ate soo much today, you really need to work out."

"If you don't do it tonight, it won't get any easier tomorrow."

"You'll feel thinner once your workout is finished."

"You won't feel guilty and then you won't eat out of guilt."

"You won't feel like a fat pig like you are feeling right now."

"You'll have something to journal about."

Needless to say, the battle to exercise or not to exercise won in favor of exercising. And you know what? All the above is true. I feel better, thinner, less like a piggy (only a smidge though, more on that later) and tomorrow won't be harder, and I have something to journal about!

So the last two days I have been ravenous and pretty much have been eating everything in sight. I ordered pizza yesterday. No I did not get the thin crust but I didn't get the deep dish either and I ordered it with just plain cheese. I ate 3 pieces out of a medium pizza and the rest is still in the fridge today. Sounds like a victory doesn't it? Considering at one time I could eat a medium pizza. However, that's not how I feel. Pizza was not the only thing I ate that day. I thought I'd order a bag of salad as well, you know to make me full before I ate the pizza, but heck... I just skipped the salad and ate that afterward a few hours later. I used plenty of ranch dressing too. I actually layered my salad. Lettuce, dressing, lettuce, dressing. Then I added all the good stuff like croutons and shredded cheese.

There's something seriously wrong when even rabbit food is fatning for you. I'm the seriously wrong part. I just can't seem to desire wanting to eat less the last two days. I ate chinese today. Oh not the good healthy vegetable stuff. Noooo. I ate the fried rice and the fried sweet and sour chicken and the ribs. All of it, topped off with a fortune cookie. Want to know what my fortune was?

"The view changes only for the leading dog."

Words of wisdom, that is. The thought of looking at dog butts through this journey sort of made me laugh though. Sort of.

So the new job is going well for the Hunk. He likes it. He was given a handbook and told to memorize it at all costs because it was the rules of the union workers he works with. He himself is not union but he works with a lot of employees who are and he needs to learn how to do things the way they are supposed to be done lest someone files a grievance against him. He's working nights and it has been a super adjustment for the entire family. The boys miss him terribly. They see him for about 20 minutes a day Tues-Sat and the Wee One always seems to know when he's leaving. He clings to the Hunk's legs, he chases him to the door, he cries... it breaks both our hearts. The Kidlet on the other hand is more understanding of Daddy leaving, it is the "When is Daddy going to be home?" part that has him not adjusting well.

The Hunk gets home anytime after 5-6 a.m. and the Kidlet wants to stay awake until Daddy gets home because he wants to see him. This just isn't possible. So by the time he wakes up, Daddy's sleeping, Daddy gets up, sees him for 20 minutes before work and the Kidlet is in bed before Daddy gets home. They all miss him so much.

As for me? I miss the man too. Desperately. I'm not sleeping well without him here and I know I never slept well before but this just feels different. I feel I haven't seen him in a long time and that the work week is a very long one. He has 2 days in a row off, which is something he never had before, but it just makes those 5 straight days of working seem to drag on.

We do love the predictablity of his schedule though. Very much. He never ever had that with his previous employer. It's sort of stabalized the family into a routine. And having Sundays and Monday's off aren't shabby either!

My parents are going to Hawaii on Wednesday. Color me jealous. I wish I was going. My father is retired now and they are just traveling fools. Las Vegas, California, now the Island of Hawaii.

You'd think they could make a teeny trip to my state considering it is right next door to theirs huh. Guess not this year. Normally I wouldn't be so bothered but we didn't get our vacation out there last year or this year and I have not seen my family (except my mother) for 3 years now. Maybe next year...

Ok, time to try and head to bed because I'm just dead on my feet these days.

Latah gatah.

Cute Shoes

Here is my cute workout shoes. You have to have good working out shoes because, as I have found for myself, my knees and lower back suffer greatly when I don't. However, if you are going to get good shoes, make sure they are cute. You have to make sure they are adorable and that you feel adorable in them. I love getting my workout shoes on. I don't like the working out by my feet are well dressed for the occasion. Ignore the pants. They should be capri's but my fat legs make them much shorter. One day they will be capri's again! Btw, for those who are wondering, my shoes are Adidas. You probably weren't but I just wanted to have a little more text to fill up this entry.

Wonders don't cease

My my my. Look at me! Back for another post so soon.

Just wanted to let ya'll know that Day 3 has been completed of my exercise program and eating right (well better anyway) program. Feels good but.... I don't know if any of you have felt this way.. but I'm sort of still waiting for the other shoe to drop. The day that I skip one workout... then that one turns into 2 and so on and so forth. Even if I skip one day and work out the next sometimes my 5 day workout weeks go to 4 and 3 and then zip.

I know that I'm the only one that can control that and right now I am. But honestly it is easier to do this when you have the same routine every day. Right now I do. Once something throws a kink into my routine I'm going to scatter. Guess I'll just have to start preparing for that now.

The Hunk said he was going to start working out in the exercise room of our apt. complex. He doesn't want to work out with DVD's with me. *pout* At least he says he's going to do something. As for doing it? I don't know yet. He's kind of lost as to what to do, how many reps, what on what days, how many lbs. ect. I'm just as clueless as he is. It isn't like we have money that we can afford a professional trainer just to get him started with some sort of routine. Hell if we could afford a PT you know he/she'd be workin' for me!

I have some old pictures of me in my younger days. I just don't feel like posting them right now. I'm off to bed. The Hunk working his new job has me sleeping maybe 4-5 hours a night. Insomnia or not. So those pictures will be forth coming.

Amazing

It is amazing what a little exercise will do for you. I just wish beyond anything that I could bottle up this feeling for the rest of the 99% of the time that I don't feel so amazing. As you might of guessed (by reasonable deduction here), I started working out again.

Yay me! No, really, yay me. I'm waiting.

Ahhhhhhhhh. I feel better now.

I joined Denise Austin's Forever Fit online program. No, I'm not putting a link up. No, it is not because the program sucks. It is because I just worked my pretty muscles way too hard to copy and paste links at 1:30 a.m. Deal.

So anyway, I joined the group. It is pretty much eDiets without the "you have to pay extra if you want any type of fitness advice and routines" schmuck. She has food, shopping lists, printable everythings, workout routines and she also has 3 different caloric intake programs. I of course opted for the highest caloric intake allowed. 1800 big ones a day. I'm feeling almost giddy about that. Almost.

I also bought her beginner exercise kit because obviously whenever you get the incentive to lose weight again, it doesn't matter if you have 50,000 tapes and DVD's of exercise routines or handy little gadgets that promised to slim your body down, you have to buy more. The old stuff has an "old, you didn't work for me because I'm still fat" air to them. Don't they? Almost mocking you... If they could speak they might say, "Well.... I didn't work because you didn't use me." or "I didn't work because you were more overweight than my inventor ever accounted for." or "I didn't work because I was just an impulse purchase and we never work." And perhaps, above all, they might say, "I'm sooo last season."

At any rate, none of my 50,000 DVD's or tapes or cute little neoprene weights, or Fanny Lifter or stretchy bands were making me very excited about jumping back into this whole "lifestyle change." I needed something new, fresh, exciting, motivating. This was going to be my answer. The starter kit. You got 3 DVD's, 3 Stretchy bands and 1 exercise ball. Fabulous! I was all ready for my brand new scenery change. Err um, I mean lifestyle change.

Then, they just sat there. For a week. Meh. I didn't feel like blowing up the exercise ball and I couldn't find my workout shoes (don't knock it, they are very important!) and so on and so forth. I guess the change of "scenery" didn't pan out so well. I finally got my butt in gear on monday and worked out. I did much better than I thought I would but I didn't make it through ever segment. I don't care. I'm just glad I didn't have a heart attack while trying to shake my ample bum to a thinner me.

You know what I saw on W@lmart(dot)c0m? Carmen Electra has workout DVD's that are sexy! Yes, Strip to get Fit! and one other one. I don't know. I want those though. That's going to be my answer now. I can get sexy while learning to be sexy. She's pretty stripper like so I figure that I'd be getting it from the horses mouth. Maybe I'll ask the birthday faerie if she'll bring them for my birthday. Of course, I want to be sexier by then anyway.

Ok, I'm off to bed. Much to tell you about the Hunk's new job, new teeth for the Wee One and the Kidlet is drivin' me cray-zee. When does school start back up again?

Vacation time!

Well, I was supposed to be going back to New Mexico today for vacation but due to circumstances beyond our control, we're staying home. That's ok though. It gives us a chance to do some spring cleaning! Yay, doesn't that sound like a stupendous vacation? Well at least the house will look better for it.

The Hunk's last day was yesterday. They gave him an award (unrelated to his leaving) and so he felt it was a nice way to "go out". Of course, I felt the award was a little to little a little too late. As long as he feels good about his leaving, that's all that matters.

I don't know what our plans are going to be this week but, hopefully, aside from the cleaning, we'll find something fun to do.

Yay for fun!